One More Question to Ask Ourselves

Excerpted with permission from “The Power of One More – the Ultimate Guide to Happiness and Success” by Ed Mylett

The unexamined life isn't worth living. — Socrates

Click To Tweet

DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT?

That is a really powerful question I ask. It’s one of many questions I’m going to ask you in this chapter and a question you should be asking yourself.

The truth is most people never do. Most people never take control of their thoughts because they don’t ask the right questions, so they have a flawed belief of what their thinking should be. That leads to an equally fundamental question.

What is thinking?

Simply put, thinking is the process of asking and answering questions of yourself. That’s how thought works. You constantly ask and answer questions in your head thousands of times a day.

So, if you want to change the quality of your thoughts, you need to change the quality of the questions you ask. It’s the quality of the questions you ask that controls the quality of the thoughts you think. You’d be amazed at how finely tuned your brain is at finding you the answers you’re looking for.

Does that make sense to you?

This could be a foundational seismic shift in your life if you begin to ask better questions. Better questions lead to better answers. Better answers lead to a better life. Most people don’t do this. But One More thinkers do. Most people ask questions that make them weaker, less resilient, or less resourceful. They take the easy way out. In some cases, these questions do harm by creating fear, anger, distrust, or a lack of confidence.

The Navy Seals are taught to ask the question, “What in this situation can I control immediately?” By contrast, most people ask themselves, “What could go wrong? What can’t I control in this situation? What should I fear and worry about?” because most of us are hard‐wired to think that way.

If you ask those types of questions, you’re always going to find yourself under duress. The answers to those questions are the answers your brain is going to find for you. Self‐examination is a critical process to uncover wisdom in your life. When you ask the right questions, you arrive at the truth about yourself. Unfortunately, looking inside your own life is not always fun. Your inner voice can be your most vocal critic, and self‐accountability means there’s no place to hide. But to achieve personal growth, One More thinkers must accept this challenge and embrace answers to the big questions in their lives.

Many times, people find it only takes one more answer to produce dramatic changes. Asking the right questions is the first step to getting the answers you need to make that happen. Getting answers removes roadblocks that help you create change. It’s difficult to fix problems anywhere else in your world until you have your own house in order.

Eugene Ionesco said, “It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question.” You humble yourself when you challenge yourself to be better. And the best way to do this is by questioning the foundation of your thoughts and actions from day to day. The answers to these big questions are as unique as you are. There are no right or wrong answers. There is no one‐size‐fits‐all solution. In many cases, it’s like peeling back the layers of an onion because the questions you ask will lead to new questions based on your experience, memories, feelings, and relationships.

Face these questions. Embrace the answers. If you’re honest with yourself, you’ll break through barriers that will lead you to an extraordinary life.

What if you could find One More powerful question to ask yourself several times a day? It’s impossible for me to guess what questions and answers are important to you. Instead, I’ve put together the following list to start your self‐examination process. Certain questions will resonate with you. Pay attention. That’s your “inner you” trying to tell you something important.

Don’t rush through these questions and the answers you uncover. Let the questions linger. Find a quiet place and let your mind go to work so the answers will have value for you. Also, think about the answers you come up with today versus the answers you’d like to have at some point in the future. Once you plant these future answers in your brain, your mind will go to work on your behalf to turn these answers into a new reality for you.

Remember, one answer can create big changes. And asking One More questions is the first step to that desired outcome.

One More Questions to Ask Yourself to Lead an Extraordinary Life:

1. What one more thing can I do to show my spouse or my partner I love them?
2. How can I do one more thing to improve my relationship with my children?
3. Is there one more thing I can do to make my family feel more special?
4. Is there one more thing I can do to show my appreciation to the people I work with?
5. What’s one more way I can adjust my thinking so I make fewer excuses?
6. What part of this situation can I control right now?
7. How is this happening for me and not to me?
8. What’s one more thing I can do to calm myself down today?
9. Is there one more thing I can do to bring myself long‐term peace?
10. What’s one more way I can worry less about what other people think?
11. What’s one more way I can bring my anger level down?
12. Is there one more thing I can do so people will see me less different than I see myself?
13. What’s one more way I can worry less about the past?
14. How can I implement one more way to worry less about the future?
15. What’s one more way I can get more excited about the future?
16. What’s one more way I will practice gratitude?
17. How do I implement one more way to procrastinate less and protect the valuable asset of my time?
18. What’s one more way I can be less of a spectator and more of a participant?
19. Can I do one more thing to ask myself hard questions even if I know I won’t like the answers?
20. What’s one more way I will tell myself it’s okay to fail and learn from my mistakes?
21. Is there one more way to be a good steward with the money I have been blessed with?
22. What’s one more way to ensure my values are consistent with my standards and goals?
23. In my work, is there one more way I can become an effective leader?
24. What one more way can I become healthier?
25. How can I make one more change to my diet to lose weight?
26. What’s one more exercise I can do at the gym to burn fat or pack on muscle?
27. What’s one more thing I can let go of that’s been holding me back and that I’m better off without?
28. How do I give myself one more block of time to let my mind wander and daydream?
29. What’s one more thing I can eliminate that’s stopping me from doing the things I could be doing?
30. What’s one more way I can change my thinking so I complain less?
31. Is there one more thing I can do to help somebody in pain who really needs me?
32. What’s the one more thing that has provided me with the most bliss recently?
33. How can I do one more thing to handle conflict better?
34. What’s one more thing I can do to better deal with the people in my life who drain the energy out of me?
35. Is there one more thing I can do to carve out more time to be mindful and intentional?
36. What’s one more thing I should do to stop holding grudges?
37. What one more thing have I learned in life that I can pass on as a mentor to others?
38. What’s one more thing I can do to enjoy my work more?
39. Was I curious enough to ask one more question to seek out answers to important questions in my life today?
40. What’s one more prayer I need to have or scripture I need to hold closer in my faith life?
41. Is there one more way I can thank and honor my God for the gifts I received today?

What Are the Answers?

Answers to these questions may make you uncomfortable. Not always. But in many cases, to grow, the best answers will be the most difficult for you to address.

You’ve heard the saying that there are no dumb questions in life? Not true! There are dumb questions. They’re the ones you ask that don’t challenge you. They’re the ones that provide you with convenient truths. You only cheat yourself and waste time when you ask yourself and others dumb questions. Making things even worse, deep down, you know when you’re doing this.

If you want to be average … if you’re happy where you’re at because you’re comfortable, scared, or lazy, and you don’t want to know how to make your life better, then don’t ask the questions that lead to your growth. Nobody can force you to do anything you don’t want to do.

“The greatest gift is not being afraid to question,” Ruby Dee once said. If you’re not healthy enough to want to gift yourself with the truth, then don’t get to the end of your life with regrets.

Some questions won’t have immediate answers. Don’t assume defeat if you can’t apply logic and solutions when that happens.

An answer to a question you ask now may not come until later. Or not at all. Give yourself credit for having the courage to ask the question and seek the answer. Remember, one question often leads to another, and another, and another.

Enlightenment travels a lot of different paths. Learn to live with the great unanswered questions in your life. Seek the answers daily. Some will come to you like a lightning bolt. Others will come to you over time.

Either way, living with the extraordinary questions and answers of your life is one of the most admirable traits of a One More thinker.

Note from Bob:  “The Power of One” is the result of more than 30 years of accumulated knowledge that Ed Mylett has used to become a highly successful entrepreneur, performance coach, bestselling author, podcaster and one of the world’s most inspirational public speakers.  You can order your “The Power of One” book today by clicking HERE