How to Listen to Your Major Donor

13 08 2012

Guest Post by Richard Perry and Jeff Schreifels  

http://www.veritusgroup.com

We often write about the subject of listening because it is the most common reason Major Gift Officer’s fail at their jobs.

First, active listening means asking questions. Questions are the best way to secure interaction and make sure you are disciplining yourself to listen. There are four types of questions you should use in your interaction with donors:

• Confirmation Questions – “So, NAME, what we have agreed to is X? Am I hearing you right on that?”

• New Information Questions – “There was one thing I was wondering about, NAME. I’m curious as to why you are so interested in X? Would you mind talking about that more with me?”

• Opinion Questions – “There is one thing I would like your opinion on, NAME. What do you think about X?”

• Commitment Questions – “Thanks so much, NAME, for your commitment to give X. So, as I understand it, you will be sending in Y on DATE and Z on DATE. Is that correct?”

1. Always ask for permission to ask questions. This shows respect for the donor, not only about the topic of the question, but as to how you are using his or her time. Here is what it sounds like: “Do you mind, NAME, if I ask you a question?”

2. Explain reasons for sensitive questions. Let’s say you want to uncover the interests of your donor. One way to do that is to find out what other organizations and causes she gives to. But just coming out and saying, “What other organizations do you give to”, may be too abrupt and seem intrusive. A better way is to say, “In order for me to get to know you better, NAME, I’d like to understand what your interests are. Would you mind sharing with me what other causes you give to so I can understand this better?”

3. Ask what benefits are desired in the donor’s giving. It is very important to understand what the donor wants to get out of the giving transaction. This is fundamental. If you don’t know this critical piece of information you will not be successful in building a good relationship with the donor. Here is a way to ask this question: “May I ask you a question, NAME? [Yes]. Well, one of the things I understand about giving is that there are reasons, often specific reasons, that people give. Sometimes those reasons are all about the cause the donor is giving to. Other times it is the cause and other personal reasons, like to memorialize a loved one or to make a statement about something that is important to the you. What is it that matters to you in your giving to our organization? And what do you want to get out of it?” Then you talk about all of that.

So questions are a very important way to foster listening. Ask a lot of questions. Start with broad topics, then narrow down to more specific ones. And always build current questions on previous responses, which means you are taking notes about the conversations you have had.

How will you know you are not listening well? Here are some clues:
1. You do all the talking.
2. You interrupt.
3. You avoid eye contact.
4. You put words in the donor’s mouth.
5. You cause the donor to become defensive by the way you speak to her.
6. You argue before the donor finishes his or her case, which means you are paying more attention to how you will respond than to what the donor is saying.
7. You digress with stories because you LOVE your stories and the sound of your voice.
8. You overdo feedback.
9. You make judgements.

Listening is also a state of the heart. If you really care about the donor you will listen well. If you don’t, and the whole thing is about the money, you won’t listen. Catch yourself not listening and you have caught yourself not caring. And that is a problem. Not caring in major gifts is one of the most damaging things that can happen in the life of a Major Gift Officer.

Make a decision to care and you will listen well

Richard Perry and Jeff Schreifels 

Collectively, Richard and Jeff have over 55 years of fundraising experience.  They have been working together for over 15 years and love what they do.  That is why a few years ago they started a major gift agency called Veritus Group.

Would you like to check out their blog?  www.veritusgroup.wordpress.com

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Bury the Clichés

9 08 2012

Excerpted with the permission of the authors from Chapter 13 of Power Questions:

“I threw him out of my office.”

“What?”

I’m with Fred, the chief executive of the North American operations of a multinational corporation. Fred was formerly the chief information officer (CIO) of one of the world’s largest banks. He’s had hundreds of salespeople call on him over the years.

“You name the company,” he tells me, “Goldman Sachs, IBM, Accenture, McKinsey, EDS, and then every bucket shop between here and the West coast as well. They’ve all tried to sell me something.”

Fred is smart and tough, and doesn’t tolerate fools. But I have a hard time picturing him throwing someone out of his office.

“You literally kicked him out? You’re kidding?”

“I’m not kidding,” says Fred. “He asked the question.”

“Which one?”

“What keeps you up at night?”

He continues, shaking his head: “You see, it’s a terrible question. Overused. Clichéd. Stale. And worst of all, lazy. I hate lazy salespeople. At a certain point it seemed that every salesperson, banker, and consultant was asking that question. They were like lemmings. They’d come and call on me and invariably ask, ‘What keeps you up at night?’”

“They thought that by posing that question I would—as if by magic—immediately volunteer to tell them all about my toughest issues. Then, they could say, ‘Ah, we have a solution to fix that.’ I started escorting them from my office.”

“And it doesn’t work that way with you?” I sheepishly ask.

“No, it doesn’t. Nor with anyone else. Look, let’s get some more coffee and I’ll explain why. I’ll tell you what the really smart ones do that is effective.”

Fred’s executive assistant brings us two more fresh cups. We move from his desk to a small sitting area with a couch, a coffee table, and an easy chair. We settle in.
I can’t believe my good fortune. I’m like a fourteen year-old again, listening to my cigar-smoking, Cognac-sipping uncle Morton discuss his philosophy of good living. But now, I’m going to school with the world’s best instructor on how to have a great first meeting with an executive prospect.

Sir Isaac Newton, referring to his extraordinary scientific breakthroughs, said, “I stood on the shoulders of giants.” I feel like Fred is lifting me onto his back, and I’m definitely going along for the ride. Big time.

“Here’s why,” Fred explains, “‘What keeps you up at night?’ is a terrible question. First, it’s a shot in the dark. It doesn’t demonstrate to the other person that you’ve done your homework, researched the organization, and thought about the issues they face. It’s a question that requires zero preparation. That’s why it’s evidence of laziness.”
I’m scribbling furiously.

“Second, if someone doesn’t already know you pretty well, they are probably not going to tell you what is really on their mind. Teasing that out requires that you first build some trust and credibility. Come on! Think about it. Am I going to immediately share my innermost cares and concerns with some salesperson I’ve never met before? Are you kidding?

“Third—and this is especially true if you’re talking to a CEO or a really senior executive—this is a ‘problem question.’ At my level, I’m focused on growth and innovation, not operational problems. I have operating executives who are paid to worry about those problems. Ultimately, executives like me are paid for growth and innovation. ‘What keeps you up at night?’ doesn’t actually help you get at the most fruitful issues.”

“So, what do the smart ones ask?”

“You have to approach a meeting with me as a balancing act. You must prepare. Read my annual report. Search the web. Read my speeches. Watch the videos of me being interviewed. Review analysts’ reports. Learn about my priorities and strategies before you walk in the door.

“But then—and this is really important—when you sit down in front of my desk, don’t presume to know what my real issues are. Be confident, but be humble. Probe and possibly suggest, but don’t walk in here and tell me what I’m concerned about.”

“The great salespeople ask indirect questions that show they know their stuff. They say things like, ‘Fred, how are you reacting to the merger of two of your biggest competitors? Or, ‘I was intrigued by what you said at the investors conference in New York last month. How is your push into Asian markets going to impact your financial controls and risk management requirements?’

“The other day, someone had carefully read our proxy statement, and she asked me some very intelligent questions about our executive compensation plan. She wanted to know why we had made certain choices. It was an engaging discussion. She kept gently probing, asking questions. She learned a lot about what is on my mind and about my talent management and retention strategies. We were satisfied with our existing provider, and had no intention of giving her any business. But she was so artful—I believe her firm will get a project from us.

“In other words, ask me questions that implicitly show you are knowledgeable and experienced. Talk about your view of my competition, and how you think the industry is evolving. Get me involved in that dialogue. Then, I’ll start to open up. Once that happens, you can be a little more direct.

“You might even say, ‘Given all that we’ve discussed—x, y, and z—where do you wish you were making faster progress? Which of these issues are proving to be the toughest nut to crack?”

We wrap up, and I’m beaming. In one hour I’ve just had a semester’s course in advanced salesmanship.

Other Questions that are Clichés: 

“What has surprised you?”

This is a question people love to ask someone who has taken on a new job or been through a significant new experience. But there’s no good answer that is honest and positive at the same time. If you’re surprised about something, it implies you were naïve and didn’t know what you were getting yourself into! If you say nothing has surprised you, then you risk coming across as complacent or insensitive. Barry Glassner, the President of Lewis and Clark College, put it this way in the Wall Street Journal:

“If I had a thousand dollars for every time I’ve been asked that question—What has surprised you?—in the seven months I’ve been in my new position as a college president, I could buy a well-equipped Lexus. It’s the ultimate ‘gotcha’ question…every answer is perilous.”

Here are the questions I prefer to ask instead: “What have you been focusing on most during your first six months on the job?” or “Have you developed a longer-term agenda yet for your role?”

“What question haven’t I asked?”

A well-known marketing expert calls this his “killer” question for wrapping up a sales call. This question-about-a-question is a patently obvious attempt to make your prospective customer a coach to you in your sales process rather than an adversary. It’s a somewhat manipulative, cutesy attempt to say, “We’re really on the same side of the table here…give me some advice to be a more effective salesperson!” Like “What keeps you up at night,” it’s also overused.

There are many more like this. They fall into the same category as the “get them saying ‘yes’ three times before you ask” approach that you should shun.

Here are the questions I prefer to ask instead: “Are there any issues we haven’t discussed that you think are relevant to this particular challenge?” or, “Is there anyone else you think I should I talk to in order to get additional perspective on this issue?”

Great Excerpt, so:

  • What questions are you going to quit using?
  • What other questions do think need to be buried?

Would you like to know more about Power Questions?  Here is a really well done video overview Power Questions by Andrew Sobel:

Authors of Power Questions:

Jerold Panas & Andrew Sobel

Jerold Panas is the world’s leading consultant in philanthropy and the CEO of Jerold Panas, Linzy & Partners, the largest consulting firm in the world for advising nonprofit organizations on fundraising.  He can be reached at http://www.jeroldpanas.com

Andrew Sobel  is the leading authority on building long-term client and other professional relationships. He can be reached at http://www.andrewsobel.com

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Would You Like to Know the Story Behind “Sixty-Two Things I’ve Learned from Josh McDowell?”

6 08 2012

Would You Believe that the Story has Something to do With a “Question?”

In October 2003, after 24 years, I stepped away from my role with Josh McDowell.  ( http://www.josh.org )

Immediately I began to wonder, what could  I give Josh to express my appreciation for 24 years of partnership in ministry?  I had absolutely no clue.  The only thing I sensed was that  it was probably not something I could pick up at the mall.

Four days later I was having breakfast with a good friend.  As I recounted the events of the week, he asked me a question:

“Bob, you worked with Josh McDowell for 24 years – what did you learn from him?”

I immediately began to share things I had learned.  After sharing five or six things, my friend asked, “Do you have these written down?”  ”No,” was my response.  He then asked, “Why not?”  I immediately responded, “No one had ever asked me this question before!”  He said, “Bob you need to write these down!”  Then after a thoughtful pause he said, “And do you know what else?  After you have made your list you need to share it with Josh – it will bless his heart!”

“BINGO!”  That was it!  I instantly knew that this was the gift I wanted to give Josh!

Over the next two months I added daily to my list.  My goal was to create a little booklet that I could have printed at Kinko’s with copies for Josh, his wife Dottie, their four children and our four children – all to be under their and our Christmas trees on December 25, 2003.   By December 19 my list numbered 62 things and it was time to head to Kinko’s if I wanted it done for Christmas morning.

About noon on Christmas Day, 2003 I got a phone call from Josh, “Bob I don’t know where you came up with this idea, but this is the greatest gift I have ever received!”  He then put Dottie on the phone who said, “Bob Tiede I am mad at you!”  I said, “Dottie it’s Christmas–You shouldn’t be mad at anyone on Christmas!”  She said, “And you shouldn’t have to cry on Christmas Day either – but for the past half hour my eyes have been filled with tears as I have read ‘Sixty-Two Things.’  Bob this is an incredible gift!  Thank you so much!”

Later, as I reflected on this experience, I realized that while I had given a gift, I had also received a great gift in return – the gift of “Ending Well!”

How many times have you walked away from a work relationship and said to yourself, “That just didn’t end as well as I would have liked,”  but you had no idea on exactly what you could have done to “end well!”

Since that day in 2003,when my friend asked me that great question, every time someone shares that they are about to change jobs (voluntarily or involuntarily) I ask, “What did you learn from your supervisor?”  After they share a few things, I ask, “Do you have these things written down?  To date, “No!”  has been everyone’s reply!  I then encourage them to make their list and when they are finished to send it to their former supervisor – as a way to “End Well.”

Your list does not have to be “Sixty-Two Things!”  It could be as short as two or three things that you learned from them that will serve you well for the rest of your life!

And it is never too late to send that gift!  How many supervisors have you had to date?  Can you imagine how they would feel if they received a short letter from you thanking them for the privilege of working with them and then sharing two or three things you learned that continue to serve you well today?  How many letters like this do you think they have ever received?

One More Thought:  ”The World is Small” and “Life is Long.”  So many times when “20 somethings” leave their first job they might think “Good Riddance!  I am glad I will never see those people again!”  Two years later, they decide to make a move from their second job and as they walk into the interview room for what they hope will be their third job, guess who is sitting there?  You are exactly right – their supervisor from their first job!  Now what kind of difference do you think it would make if two years early they had sent that supervisor a note thanking them for two or three things they had learned from her/him?  You are exactly right – an job offer is almost guaranteed!

You can download a free copy of “Sixty-Two Things I’ve Learned from Josh” at:  http://thetiedes.cccministry.org/resources.php  (You will also find 35 other Leadership Development Resources that are available for free download)

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The Answers are in the Questions

2 08 2012

Guest Post by Lyn Boyer

Leaders often find themselves in situations in which they coach others or they must get to the heart of very difficult situations so they can make better decisions. Their ability to ask questions and sometimes to help others clarity their own meaning are frequently key to their ability to function effectively. However, leaders often have not developed the skills required to ask productive questions.

Two recent conversations reminded me of the value and importance of questions.

A parent complained about one-word responses from his 14-year-old son. “How was school today?” …“Fine.”; “Do you have any homework?”… “No.”; “Where are you going?”… “Out.”

A coaching client explored how she could avoid some of the misunderstandings that occurred when she and a business partner discussed how to move their business forward. Each of them heard the same conversations, but each came away with different assumptions about what their conversations meant.

In these and many other situations, the questions one asks determine the responses. Three strategies help listeners and speakers understand situations more clearly. These strategies are clarifying, restating and summarizing.

  • Clarifying questions ask for more information. (Who is involved? What is the purpose? Why is this situation a concern? Can you tell me more about…? Why do you think this situation occurred? How did you react to her comments? How did others react?)
  • Restating is also called reflective listening. These questions repeat or reflect what the speaker said. A listener pauses after restating his understanding of previous comments to provide the original speaker an opportunity to reflect and clarify his meaning. (i.e. It sounds as if you were following company policy… The team seemed frustrated and angry… You were very confused about the situation… Your group proposed these options…)
  • Summarizing involves stating ones understanding of an event or situation once a speaker explains it. Summarizing allows the speaker to hear the listener’s perception and determine if the two perceptions agree. (i.e. After you met with the client you…. Then… ; You are concerned that he seemed… because… ; You have suggested the following options. Which seem most workable?)

After gaining a clear understanding of a situation, leaders often need to delve deeper and to explore different options or assumptions. This requires asking powerful or probing questions.

In normal conversation, many questions call for only “yes”, “no” or short factual answers requiring little thought. Short-answer questions include: Have you discussed this with your colleagues? Who is helping you with this? What approach do you plan to use?

Probing questions go beyond short answers; they require additional thought and consideration. They begin more often with how and why rather than who, what, where, and when. They are open-ended.

Probing questions challenge an individual’s or group’s thinking. They invite reflection and divergent thought. They can prompt a person or group to consider different options or points of view. They can also change the course of action.

Examples of probing or powerful questions are:

  • What assumptions are you making about his motivation? What if the opposite is true? What other assumptions can you consider?
  • What possibilities arise from this dilemma?
  • What options do you see? What other options are possible?
  • What do you fear? Why is this situation a concern for you?
  • How have you dealt with similar situations? Do you see a pattern?
  • How does this course of action serve you? What are possible negative ramifications?
  • What are possible roadblocks to your chosen course of action? How can you minimize them? How can you turn the roadblocks into stepping-stones?

As with clarifying, restating, and summarizing, asking powerful questions requires extensive practice and skill. As I observe the frustration my workshop participants express as they practice asking powerful questions, I understand that learning to ask questions that probe, explore and analyze a situation takes more than simple discussion about questioning techniques. Learning to ask powerful questions requires tremendous commitment and practice. It also demands genuine curiosity and concern.

However, asking powerful questions is an important skill that leaders (and parents) can develop. With practice, leaders can obtain tremendous results with individuals in their groups and organizations. As a parent and former high school principal, I recognize that with teenagers it may take a little longer.

What are the challenges you see to asking good questions? How do you overcome them? What other strategies do you use?

Dr. Lyn Boyer is a leadership coach, author and facilitator focusing on the emotional side of leadership—Affective Leadership℠. Her background as high school principal, coordinator of leadership development, and college professor provides a unique perspective.  Her website is:  http://www.lynboyer.net

Her book, Connect: Affective Leadership℠ for Effective Results, is available in Paperback and eBook in bookstores and online.

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What’s Better than Small Talk?

30 07 2012

Guest Post by Judy Douglass

The introvert in me resists social settings filled with strangers I must talk to.

But that is a common component of my job:  meeting, greeting, welcoming new people.  Casual conversation at a reception or over dinner.   Exactly the kind of interaction I don’t prefer.

But my goal is to make these people feel comfortable, to get to know them and introduce them to our ministry.  To begin to build a relationship—with me and with our organization.

I’m a storyteller by nature, so I could entertain and inform them for some time.  Some of that is appropriate and helpful, but then I don’t get to know them and they don’t feel valued.

So what do you talk about past weather and family?  How do you pursue meaningful conversation?

The answer, of course, is to ask the right questions.  I go into such gatherings with several in mind:  Inquiries that draw them out, elicit more than yes or no answers, evoke authentic responses.

Here is my favorite question:  How has God surprised you lately?

If they need a little more guidance, I might say:  What has He taught you through some recent event—it can be negative or positive?  What have you learned about God, or yourself, or your purpose as He has intersected your life?

I have been amazed at the stories I have heard:  A struggle with a wayward child, the blessing of a rich relationship, a character flaw revealed and transformed, God’s willingness to use a weak vessel in powerful ministry, grace and strength through a debilitating illness, peace in the loss of a loved one….

This question has never failed to draw people into deeper revelation of their lives.  And almost always they return the ask, and I can share a recent story of discovery or growth.

I have loved our time together, and the introvert in me has not been stressed.  A relationship has begun—and has even occasionally led to friendship.

So, how has God surprised you lately?

Judy Douglass is a writer, speaker and encourager.  She partners with her husband, Steve, to lead Campus Crusade for Christ International.  A former magazine editor and author of five books, Judy travels the globe to love and encourage staff to believe God for the more He wants to do in and through them.  She writes at Kindling (www.inkindle.wordpress.com) and tweets @Jeedoo417.

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“Leading with Questions”

26 07 2012

Special Note:  In 2006 I was browsing in a (now closed) Borders Bookstore and came across Leading With Questions by Michael Marqurdt.  I only had to peruse a few pages before declaring to myself, “This is a Keeper!”  This book changed forever how I lead!  Recently I have had the privilege of interacting with Mike and he graciously agreed to do several guest blogs and has given me his “cart-blanch” permission to excerpt from Leading With Questions in future posts! Thank You Mike!

Guest Post by Michael Marquardt

Asking rather than telling, questions rather than answers, has become the key to leadership excellence. Peter Drucker noted that the leader of the past may have been a person who knew how to tell, but certainly the leader of the future will be a person who knows how to ask. With the growing complexity and speed of change, the traditional hierarchical model of leadership that worked yesterday will not work tomorrow. The leader simply won’t know enough to adequately tell people what to do. No one person can master all the data needed to address the complex issues.

Over 2000 years ago, Socrates realized that leading was much more a matter of asking the right questions than of giving answers, and developed what he called the dialectic – a method of questioning in order to get at the truth.

Today’s leaders face the tremendous challenge of leading in an answer-oriented, fix-it-quick world where more people around them clamor for fast answers—sometimes any answer. Ironically, responding to such pressures will cast them adrift as they will be moving from impactful, long-term solutions to real problems. Leaders need to realize that statements alone do not lead to deep thinking; rather questions ultimately lead to breakthroughs in productivity or innovation. Leaders who lead with questions know that the quiet distinctions and fresh perspectives gained by questions reveal new possibilities.

Too few leaders lead with questions; rather they tend to dictate or debate rather than inquire and dialogue. Most leaders are unaware of amazing power of questions, and how they can generate short-term results and long-term learning and success. Leaders who do not ask questions tend to experience dire consequences. Most disasters share a common thread—the inability or unwillingness of the participants and leaders to raise questions about their concerns.  Some group members may fear that they are the only one who has a particular concern (when, in fact, many people have similar concerns). Others feel that their question has already been answered in the minds of the other group members, and if they ask the question, it would be considered a dumb question—and they would be “put down” as being stupid or not going along with the group.

Several years ago, Michael Hammer chronicled several corporate successes and failures. He examined why Wal-mart overcame Sears, why Pan Am became extinct, and why Howard Johnson was beaten by McDonald’s, Burger King and KFC. All these failures, he concluded, shared one underlying cause—leadership did not ask the probing questions that might have led them to challenge their basic assumptions, to refresh their strategies, and to change their ways of operating. Such questions may have prevented the death or demise of these companies.

Michael J. Marquardt is the President, World Institute for Action Learning and a Professor at George Washington University. Mike is the author of 20 books and over 100 professional articles in the fields of leadership, learning, globalization and organizational change including Action Learning for Developing Leaders and Organizations and Leading with Questions.

http://www.wial.org

Now a question for you:  What  probing questions do you need to ask yourself and those you lead that will challenge your basic assumptions, refresh your strategies, and  change your ways of operating?

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“There is only one question that I ask!”

23 07 2012

The scriptures say, “Man plans his way, but God orders his footsteps.” Proverbs 16:9

Have you ever crossed paths with someone at just the right time? Looking back, was it quickly obvious to you that the Lord had directed your steps? May I share a story with you?

In January, 2005, I was spending time with our dear friends and ministry partners, Don and Vicki Carmichael, in Birmingham, Alabama. During my visit, Don said, “Bob because of your role in Leadership Development for Campus Crusade, tomorrow morning we are going to have breakfast with our pastor, Chris Hodges.” Don shared that four years earlier, Chris moved to Birmingham to plant a new church, called the Church of the Highlands, which by then had an average attendance of about 3,000 per Sunday. (Today, attendance is more than 12,000)

The next morning Don and I met Chris at the International House of Pancakes. I wish you could have been there. I should have brought a tape recorder. I could not eat and take notes near as fast as Chris was sharing his incredible insights and wisdom regarding developing a “Leadership Development Culture.”

Chris shared several things with me that morning that I will never forget! (Let me preface this by saying, Chris shared this with a humble heart.) Chris shared that since the start of The Church of the Highlands four years earlier, he had disciplined himself to never ask two questions. He shared that he would guess that 99% of his fellow pastors ask these two questions every Monday morning.

He then asked me if could guess what those two questions are?  With the help of a bit of  ”charades” (Chris rubbed his thumb and index finger together and then pointed to his nose) I came up with the two questions:   “How many nickels and how many noses did we have yesterday?”

(Pastors are not the only people that ask these two questions….Cru staff, including me, also do.)

Chris said that the reason that he has disciplined himself to never ask those two questions is that if he did, it would not matter what he told his staff, lay leaders and congregation the rest of the week was really important–they would instinctively know that what was really, really important to Pastor Hodges is “Nickels and Noses!”

Chris went on to share that there is only one question that he consistently asks. In fact, there is only one question on the development review forms for his staff, by which they may receive merit pay increases. He asked me if I would be interested to know what that question was.

Interested? He not only had me hooked, I was ready to jump into the boat! He then shared the one question he keeps asking:

“What are you doing to develop leaders?”

Chris shared that no church or organization or business can grow any faster than its ability to develop leaders. And when a church/organization/business focuses on developing leaders, growth takes care of itself.

WOW! Although my pancakes were gone before we left IHOP, I am still chewing on the things Chris shared with me that morning.

Now four questions for you:

  1. If in whatever role you are leading you place the highest value on “Who will do the absolute best job?” who is most likely to lead the effort from beginning to end?  Answer:  Most likely you!
  2. But if in that same role your highest value is “Developing others to lead,”  how might that change how you will approach that effort?  Answer:  Most likely you would consistently look for opportunities to allow others to lead -so that by the end of  that effort you might have 2-3 or more individuals ready to lead future similar efforts.
  3. How will consistently asking yourself, “What am I doing to develop leaders?” change your leadership?
  4. How will consistently asking those you lead, “What are you doing to develop leaders?” change their leadership?

“Good leaders are remembered by how many followers they create, but GREAT leaders are remembered by how many leaders they create.”  Insideoutleadership.com

Which of your friends would thank you if you forwarded this post to them?

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Mission Isn’t Important. It’s Everything!

19 07 2012

Excerpted with the permission of the authors from Chapter Five of Power Questions:

Years of helping to solve problems has taught me that when you listen effectively and empathetically, it shows you care. And until people believe you care, they won’t fully engage with you.

I am sitting with Rick Haber, who is CEO at Life Health.  It’s a $2 billion health care corporation.  This is our regular monthly coaching meeting.

Life Health is a large not-for-profit medical center.  The only other hospital in the area is St. Frances.  It is a much smaller hospital, located in the wealthiest area of the city.

“I’m making an intensive drive to take over St. Frances,” Haber tells me.  “They have the largest cardiac program in the region and several dozen top heart specialists.  I need to have them in my camp.  It’s the one area where we have a void.  I’ll take over the whole hospital if I need to.”

“I can see where you’re coming from, Rick,” I reply.  “You’re an ambitious guy.  Because of your drive and persistence, Life Health has become the market leader in this town. Can you remind me,” I ask him,  “What is the mission of Life Health?”

“That’s easy.  I talk to my staff about it all the time.  ‘To offer the most effective program in vital health maintenance and illness prevention and to deliver the most caring and responsive treatments available at the lowest cost possible.’”

I pause and am silent. I let it sink in. I ask Rick, “How would this takeover further your mission statement? Your core purpose?”

“Well,” Rick begins. Then he pauses.

“Well, I just saw an opportunity that I could move in on. You know, I’m a pretty aggressive guy.” My ears perk up. Whenever I hear the word “just,” an alarm goes off. (I’m reminded that Harry Emerson Fosdick said that a person wrapped up in himself makes a pretty small package.)

“Tell me, Rick, where in that Mission Statement does it indicate that hijacking the cardiac care of St. Frances Hospital is what your mission is all about?  You’re going to kill them. They’ll end up getting dismantled when it’s over.”

“What are you saying?” he asks.

“I’m not saying, I’m asking” I tell him.

Then I stop talking.  I am quiet.  It is a World Series Silence—like what happens when the visiting team has scored eight runs in the first inning.

I say it again: “Rick, I’m asking what your mission is and how this idea will further it. Is it consistent with what you stand for?”

He doesn’t have to answer—I can see it in his face. Rick knows that taking over the cardiac program from St. Frances has nothing to do with meeting Life Health’s mission.  He knows that even without the cardiac program, they’d still be the dominant force in the marketplace.”

“Rick,” I add, “we both know that bigger isn’t better—better is better.”

Mission is everything. It is your true North. When someone is making a big move—a significant decision—check to see if it is consistent with who they are. Ask: “How will this further your mission and goals?”

Great Excerpt, so:

  • What might you be planning to do that you need to ask, “How will this further our mission and goals?”
  • What might you be doing now that you need to ask, “How does this further our mission and goals?”
  • Who else should you ask, “How will this further your mission and goals?”

Would you like to know more about Power Questions?  Here is a really well done video overview Power Questions by Andrew Sobel:

Authors of Power Questions:

Jerold Panas & Andrew Sobel

Jerold Panas is the world’s leading consultant in philanthropy and the CEO of Jerold Panas, Linzy & Partners, the largest consulting firm in the world for advising nonprofit organizations on fundraising.  He can be reached at http://www.jeroldpanas.com

Andrew Sobel  is the leading authority on building long-term client and other professional relationships. He can be reached at http://www.andrewsobel.com

Which of your friends would thank you for forwarding this post to them?

So, what do you think of today’s post?

 


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Three Simple Questions

16 07 2012

Would you like to know three quick, simple questions that will instantly move your conversations beyond the weather and how your sports team are doing?

Several years ago I was visiting a church in the state of Washington.

One of the women on the church staff shared about a recent phone conversation she had with a friend in another state.  She said that whenever we connect we always ask each other three questions:

1. What’s on your schedule?

2. Who’s on your heart?

3. How can I pray for you?

To myself, I said, “BINGO!” and immediately wrote the three questions down.  Frankly I don’t remember anything from the pastor’s message that morning (and I am not suggesting it wasn’t good), but I am still making use of those three questions!

Idea:   Who are five friends that you could e-mail or text or call today to ask:

 ”You have been on my mind!

I was just wondering:

1. What’s on your schedule?

2. Who’s on your heart?

3. How can I pray for you?”

Love,”

How would you feel if one of your friends sent you an e-mail or text with these three questions?

By the way – I am your friend and would love to know your answers to the three questions – please send them to me at bob.tiede@ccci.org  I promise to keep your answers confidential and I promise to pray for you!

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How Can You More Effectively Coach Others?

9 07 2012

Coaching is really simply asking questions to help people think through how they can get to “Where They Want to Be” from “Where They Are.”

Did you know that you could effectively “Coach” a “Brain-Surgeon” one day, a “Technology Company CEO” the next and the “Governor of Your State” the following?

You may be wondering, “How can that be?”   The answer is:  ”You don’t need to be a ‘Subject Matter Expert’ to ‘Coach’ someone!  You simply ask the questions!  They are the ones that provide the content!”

Would you like to see “The Coaching Process” that I use to coach leaders around the globe?  

In it’s simplest form “The Coaching Process” asks:

1. Where do you want to be?

2. Where are you now?

3. What will you have to do to get from “here” to “there?”

“The Coaching Process” below adds a few more questions – but the essence is really the 3 questions above!

So what can you do to sharpen your “Coaching Skills?”   (Clue:  You can’t learn to “Swim” by reading a book on “Swimming!”   You have to jump into the water!)

You are 100% correct – You have to start “Coaching” someone!  

Which of your associates/friends could you forward this post to with a suggestion for the two of you to meet – perhaps over breakfast or lunch – to “Coach” each other?  Do not be surprised if in a “Coaching Session” as short as 5 minutes you actually experience a significant break-through!

So, what do you think of today’s post?


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